When I lie, it’s most often a lie of omission. Are you more of a falsehood teller? Or do you lie out of ignorance? Or is there a particular subject you’re likely to lie about? Or a person who you tell most of your lies to?
Do you always tell the truth? If yes what type of lie was that?
“I’m fine.”
Ouch
I’m good, how are you?
“Did you find everything okay?”
Dude, you’re a grocery cashier. I know full well that if I unload my whole fucking arrogant engineer-ass evaluation of your whole store’s problems at your face, it will do absolutely nothing but make us both unhappy. So I don’t.
Everything is great.
Y’all are out of the good eggs and I had to settle for the okay eggs.
I understand why maple syrup is next to Bisquick instead of next to sugar and molasses and corn syrup, but I still disapprove. Sweeteners are sweeteners, not baking ingredients.
But you really don’t care. You have zero input into your store’s purchasing decisions. You want to ring me up and get through your day and go home to your hot boyfriend.
So yeah, I found everything okay.
Nevermind that store layouts are designed by corporate, so the local grunts likely don’t have any say over product placement
I’ve done time studies for factories and redone processes to make them more efficient even though it really isn’t my job function. During COVID I wanted to have an aneurysm every time I went into a store that obviously didn’t have anyone that had any ability to create a proper flow and just tossed lines wherever. But no I bit my tongue instead of being that engineer to the poor employees having to work in a thankless public facing job.
I thought it was a pretty big win for common sense when the local Trader Joe’s switched to a single queue rather than one queue per register.
“No it’s fine. I don’t mind.”
I’ll do it tomorrow.
I wish this comment wasn’t so relatable.
Or even “I’ll do it in an x amount of time”
I’ll do it after 3 hours. I’ll do it in the evening. I’ll do it in 3 days.
I lie on the internet fairly regularly as weird precaution to make myself less identifiable. I don’t want any of my accounts to link to eachother, let alone back to me
Approved. Just make it a good and enticing story. I don’t care so much if it’s true 😉
That’s my sentiment as well. I take everything I read with a grain of salt, so should everyone else. I come to comment sections for entertainment, not facts.
“Yeah, I’m fine”
I’m a big fan of the super obvious lie. It makes people think you’re really bad at lying, and they overestimate their ability to detect your lies, so they let their guard down.
I hope this email finds you well.
Oh, man. Email is a real bitch. The context for me when I say this is the shipping industry and/or the software developers for shipping software.
If you ask more than one question, take your pick, just one will be answered. “Please see below?” You’re going to get asked a question that could’ve been answered by “please see below.” These dumbfucks will go out of their way to make anything as grating as possible. Send an attachment? “Oh my ancient-ass Outlook Express is too fucked up to show me that.” S/MIME? “Can’t read your email!” JSON? “What’s that, we run a cobbled SOAP someone wrote back in 1999.”
People can’t figure out threading if it were to save their life. Add in a bunch of douchebag hotshots between separate threads, discuss four different accounts between three threads, why not? Apparently email is a complicated brand new technology that office workers have yet to master but sure let’s conduct all of our business on it forsomefucking reason.
Fuck
“I’m a boy”
The fact that this is a common lie for me might mean that people I talk to don’t believe it either.
I hope one day you are able to live your truth. ♥
“I’m working on it”
“I will do it tomorrow”, I say that to myself and to many people. Not proud of this.
Most common lies I tell are usually just to stop people focussing on a certain part of a story or anecdote. They’re technically lies but aren’t relevant.
Lets say i’m talking about my weekend to a friend or colleauge. I mention that on friday night in a certain bar or location something happened. Well if I know that person is going to pick up on the location eg: “Why were you there”.
I don’t really care they know I just cba with my story being picked apart for something that’s not really that relevant, I was just setting the scene.
I do this to keep stories or conversations moving as well, but I more often do so to avoid talking about something I don’t feel like sharing with them, because I know it’s going to draw more questions and I just don’t care to give that information or have that conversation.
It’ll be okay.
At work, I oversimplify things to the point that they’re no longer strictly true all the time.
